Manage People with Patience

Featured Image Credit: Gratisography

People are fascinating. I used to view people in two ways; either I would think they were like me and expected them to act accordingly, or I treated them as I thought they could be. Both ways work, and they also fail in certain situations.

It is easy to have good intentions when interacting with others. I like to give people the benefit of the doubt; I know many do. Others I've met will do this after being let down by the person. They believe this person will come through even a third or fourth time.

If you run a team or sales group, it can be tempting to work with someone with whom you see the potential. They have all the tools but don't bring in enough business. They might not be suitable for the position at this moment in their life.

When we let emotions into our decisions, we begin to make terrible decisions. Business decisions made out of emotion rarely work out well.

I learned years ago I couldn't assume others would share my work ethic and beliefs. Not everyone does, and that is okay.

I also learned not every person who is talented at a position wants the position or accolades.

Instead, it is easier to lead, interact, and build relationships with people when you understand who they are.

People will you who they are, eventually. You have to be willing to read the signs. Even in the dating world, you can pretend to be an unrealistic version of yourself, but your true self will poke through at some point.

How do we interact with people and get the results from the interaction we desire? How do we free ourselves in the process?

Find Out Who They Are

People will give you clues as to who they are.

What do people consistently do? We are what we do daily. We don't just manifest into who we are; it takes years of training ourselves, even if we don't realize it.

A person who keeps showing up late or no-showing you when they said they would help is unreliable. You would be crazy to make them in charge of something requiring being prompt and on time to events.

Instead, you would fish out other traits and find ones that would better fit elsewhere.

People who consistently work hard will always work hard, but if they have trouble leading a team, you won't look to make them a supervisor at the first opportunity, would you? It would not be prudent.

Instead, figure out their skills and passions and try to keep them in those positions. You can always train them to be leaders if they want to advance.

Their character tells you who they are.

It will frustrate you less once you know what to expect from people.

Accept People Will Fail

Don't be afraid to push people to better themselves: higher goals, production, and belief. You don't want set goals too low for someone who doesn't show up on time. You want to push them to be better.

Some people need encouragement and a tough goal. They may enjoy a challenge. Others may wilt under pressure and need more one-on-one time and manageable goals until they reach the ultimate goal.

Please don't get angry when people fail to achieve the goals you've set for them. Don't get upset if a person fails at a project you gave them,

Instead, accept it as a part of life and then deconstruct it to identify the areas for improvement. Feedback will help to keep them confident and working hard. 

Don't accept failure. Learn from it, but don't let it stress you out. If you have people who keep missing goals, chat with them a bit. Sometimes, it just may not be a good fit for you both, and they need to move on.

This failure could simply be setting them up for their next big move. Your team's or your leadership failures serve as examples for others you talk to in the future.

Sometimes People Surprise You

People will show you who they are. Sometimes though, they'll show you something else. They may knock out an important presentation—an employee who can finish your paperwork faster than anyone else.

You may have seen them not working or making mistakes, but you put them in a different place, and they may launch beyond your expectations.

In the UFC, small fighters were some of the world's strongest and most formidable fighters. They should lose these fights on paper but find a way to win. Even if someone doesn't seem like they will excel at a project, give them a chance and the tools. Give them an opportunity, and you may be surprised by the result.

People who seem distant and daydreaming during the day may be great for a new project you have. They find the work exhilarating, exciting, and unique—a true challenge.

Push their results. Give them chances to surprise, and who knows; they may even surprise themselves.

What's Next?

Believe who people are when they tell you both verbally and non-verbally. Let your experience speak to who people are but don't let it trap you into thinking they can't evolve.

It can cause tension dealing with other people. We free ourselves from some of the stress by understanding who people are and treating them accordingly.

First, find out who they are with first impressions, trends and patterns. Although not always the most accurate measure, people don't become who they are overnight. If you don't respond to texts, you didn't just stop one day. It was probably a gradual decline in responding.

Accept people will fail. Understand not everyone will meet their goals. They may need extra attention to help identify issues and unlock their skills. Sometimes it could just be that your business or entity isn't the right place for them.

By recognizing it early, you can allow them to find something more accommodating to them. Trying to make things work when they aren't doesn't benefit anyone.

Keep in mind people may surprise you. Those who you don't believe are good in one area could be incredibly proficient in other areas. Don't count people out because of those preconceived notions from earlier. Find a place where they may have the opportunity to grow.

We find freedom in managing our expectations. Don't expect the world, but don't let them settle either. Please do your part to push and guide them forward. You may be surprised by what comes of the effort.