Featured Image Credit: Paolo Bendandi on Unsplash
"But I did okay, didn't I?" Bernie inquires about Death. "I mean, I got, what, fifteen thousand years. That's pretty good, isn't it? I lived a pretty long time?"
The lawyer had existed since the Mammoths walked the earth. A collapsed wall is what ends his long life.
Death replied, "You lived what anybody gets, Bernie. You got a lifetime."
This interaction occurs in Author Neil Gaiman's Sandman Series.
There was another quote I heard though I am unable to attribute it. It was to look at these people who've passed on the news. Some from accidents, others from natural causes. Some pass from cancer, others in unexpected situations.
Each of those people had dreams. They had plans for their day, plans for the month, and plans for their life. Those are plans they won't fulfill.
I spent years wasting time. I felt like I had unlimited time to do what I wanted. It wasn't until the Neil Gaiman quote and my discovery of Stoicism that it hit home.
In Stoicism, they have a saying about life, Momento Mori. Memento Mori is a practice of reflecting on our mortality.
The point of reflecting on mortality is realizing life's finite nature. Life is changing. It all comes and goes.
This revelation has had a profound impact on me. I commit to enjoying more moments with my family and not letting the time fly by.
I'm more active in pursuing writing and sharing my thoughts and knowledge. Rather than worrying about what people might say, produce for those who will benefit.
This message is not to frighten but to enlighten. Our time is limited. Squeeze value out of every second.
It is so easy to put off the things we want to do. To postpone a vacation or decision. To toil longer in a job where you may be unsatisfied. The usual humdrum of life gets us complacent.
We don't believe it will change at all. It does every day, so slow that we don't perceive it. We look at our life and wonder where the time went.
Part of living a fulfilled life is pursuing what we feel is essential.
Another quote I heard was from a former prison inmate. He was discussing his first days in prison when one inmate told him, "Don't worry, the time will fly by." He responded, "Why would I want my life to fly by?"
Live a Life You're Proud Of
Apple founder Steve Jobs is someone I quote often. I like this one.
"Your time is limited, so don't waste it living someone else's life. Don't be trapped by dogma — which is living with the results of other people's thinking."
In America, though not the only country, you have expectations when you're young. The life put on you is to go to college, get a job, and buy a house. You have a family and settle down.
I'm happy living in a house with my wife and children. I love it. I even enjoy writing and making videos.
But some people follow this trajectory because they want their parents to be happy. In other countries, the pull toward what the family desires are stronger.
Or you may not want to upset the balance of your comfort.
Do your best to ensure you live a life where you can be proud of yourself.
Everything Changes
As much as you may want to freeze life at specific points, you can't. Children grow up and get older. Friends move on, get new jobs and move.
I know my life has changed in the last ten years—the last five.
By living, you are engaging in change.
Things may not be the way they are in two weeks. Accept that it will change. Acknowledge it every day.
The lockdowns of the early 2020's demonstrated just how sudden things can change.
Once you acknowledge the changes, you can make better decisions. Rather than put off that time with your parents next week, you'll spend the time.
This isn't to say be reckless and take unnecessary risks. Just be aware you may not have ten years to launch your dream product. Work toward it daily.
You may not have three years to take your dream vacation.
Things change, for better or worse. It is up to you to seize those moments and make the most of them.
Live for the Moment
I've heard this statement for as long as I remember: "Stop and smell the roses." Which means to live in the moment, slow down and enjoy life.
When I was younger, this phrase didn't mean much. Things were going quick, and I was out living life. Sometimes I wasn't.
After all, when you're young, you have a long time, at least it's easy to believe.
Don't get caught up in living for the weekend. Or letting these days feel like they are one giant wall of gray. Find a way to inject some color.
Take a moment to relax and reflect where you can.
Don't deny those moments to spend time with friends when they invite you. At least don't let the reason be that you're tired or busy all the time.
Live for the moments as you are in them. It is great to plan and prepare for the future. Just don't forget to live in the present while you do.
What's Next?
This is not about getting upset or depressed but about encouraging action. Don't think you have all the time in the world. Understand that everything can change. For me, it was my dad being diagnosed with brain cancer.
I couldn't imagine that year would be the last time I saw him.
It is easy to believe things will continue as they are but in time, it changes.
Live a life you're proud of by striving toward your dreams. It is okay if things don't work out. The main thing is to have no regrets about trying.
Everything in life changes. Life takes us to different places.
Don't' fight the change but understand and acknowledge it.
With all these changes, it is essential to living for the moment. If things get too fast, slow down. Don't let life pass.
We all get a lifetime. We don't know what it looks like when it's all said and done. What we do know is where we spend our time. Choose wisely and live each day as if it matters. It does.